ORPHAN ~ BELOVED CHILD
A child whose parent dies is an orphan,
but there are children
whose parents have relinquished the parental roles
of protecting and nurturing
those entrusted to their care
in order to address a personally-assigned agenda.
To be "orphaned" while a parent is still present
in the child's world
brings with it a conflict not easily resolved.
Children tend to determine their value and worth
by the way others relate to them,
the input of those who have given them life.
Their hearts are loyal.
Experiences are interpreted
in ways that "make sense" to their limited worldview.
Being helpless in the world
where power resides with those who are bigger and stronger
provides no hope.
Some give up, becoming victims.
Others seek explanations that allow them to continue on
in their fight to survive.
One may conclude that if he tries harder,
he may win the parent back into the God-appointed role.
Another may conclude that she is defective
and seek to "hide" what she deems unacceptable to the parent.
Still others may retaliate and angrily challenge
any and all present in their world to a duel,
trying to feel some sense of control
or to redistribute their pain
in an effort to make it more manageable.
And the list goes on…
But the Bible provides a different hope in Psalm 27:10:
”Though my father and mother forsake me,
the Lord will receive me.”
It speaks of receptive arms outstretched,
a heart that extends a warm welcome
to a child, of any age, left to weather the storms of life
without the protective and nurturing presence of an earthly parent
who's absconded from his role to pursue a different goal.
God will not force His way into any child's world.
He waits, inviting the abandoned ones into His embrace,
eager to hear a response like that in Psalm 27:11a:
“Teach me your way, O Lord…”
He is a teacher, and there is much to learn.
Moving from one family system to another
means learning new ways of relating.
It is risking to trust, accepting a new identity,
letting go of self-protective behaviors.
It seems a daunting task,
the move from orphan to a beloved child!
Twila Jean Charles
February 26, 2008
A child whose parent dies is an orphan,
but there are children
whose parents have relinquished the parental roles
of protecting and nurturing
those entrusted to their care
in order to address a personally-assigned agenda.
To be "orphaned" while a parent is still present
in the child's world
brings with it a conflict not easily resolved.
Children tend to determine their value and worth
by the way others relate to them,
the input of those who have given them life.
Their hearts are loyal.
Experiences are interpreted
in ways that "make sense" to their limited worldview.
Being helpless in the world
where power resides with those who are bigger and stronger
provides no hope.
Some give up, becoming victims.
Others seek explanations that allow them to continue on
in their fight to survive.
One may conclude that if he tries harder,
he may win the parent back into the God-appointed role.
Another may conclude that she is defective
and seek to "hide" what she deems unacceptable to the parent.
Still others may retaliate and angrily challenge
any and all present in their world to a duel,
trying to feel some sense of control
or to redistribute their pain
in an effort to make it more manageable.
And the list goes on…
But the Bible provides a different hope in Psalm 27:10:
”Though my father and mother forsake me,
the Lord will receive me.”
It speaks of receptive arms outstretched,
a heart that extends a warm welcome
to a child, of any age, left to weather the storms of life
without the protective and nurturing presence of an earthly parent
who's absconded from his role to pursue a different goal.
God will not force His way into any child's world.
He waits, inviting the abandoned ones into His embrace,
eager to hear a response like that in Psalm 27:11a:
“Teach me your way, O Lord…”
He is a teacher, and there is much to learn.
Moving from one family system to another
means learning new ways of relating.
It is risking to trust, accepting a new identity,
letting go of self-protective behaviors.
It seems a daunting task,
the move from orphan to a beloved child!
Twila Jean Charles
February 26, 2008
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